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You should really get that Prenup

By Mark Westin posted 02-15-2021 02:59 AM

  

Prenuptial agreements have gotten a lot of negative attention throughout the years. This is mostly thanks to movies and media displaying only the negatives. The reality is that a prenup is beneficial to both parties, but because of the terrible PR, most couples never sign one. The truth is, if you have assets to protect or student debt still to pay, you will be saving yourself and your partner by arranging a prenup.


What is a prenuptial agreement?

The unaffectionately termed “prenup” is a legal document drawn up and signed by couples before getting married. The contents of a prenuptial agreement revolve around the individual and soon-to-be joint finances of the undersigned. It is not a document to prevent a spouse from cheating, as Hollywood often suggests. It is a plan for the future in terms of assets, debts, and other financial matters. A well-drafted prenup will protect your assets, provide for your children, separate your debts, and, yes, specify what happens in case of divorce or death. The contract is as important as getting car, home, or life insurance, as this link explains.


But I’m not ever getting divorced


No one intends to get divorced. No one plans for their incredible love story to end up broken. However, the divorce rate in the USA is between 40% and 50% in 2020. It is definitely worth some thought and planning if one in every two marriages might end in divorce. You are not dooming your marriage. You are being financially prudent. A prenup is not meant to do the other in. Two partners who care for each other will not want to harm the other. The contract is there to protect both parties. 


The prenuptial contract may include: 

  • Assets acquired before the marriage like investments, property, or inheritance
  • Provisions for the welfare of your children
  • Division of debt acquired before or after marriage
  • Spousal support
  • Estate planning
  • Incapacity or death of either or both partners
  • Division and attribution of income

You have to ask yourself a few questions. Do you want to inherit your partner’s debt? Do you want your kids and spouse to be cared for if the worst happens? Do you want to be cared for if the worst happens? 


How do I bring it up?

Talking about finances is never easy for anyone. You cannot base a successful marriage on dishonesty. I realize very few are out to deceive their would-be partner, but omission can be just as harmful. It is especially true when it comes to your financial standing. There is no quick-fix answer here. Talk about it. Realize that you are doing it for your partner. 


Your first step is to make sure you have the time to have a decent conversation. Make it a priority. Do it at home rather than in a public place. Start gently, but don’t beat around the bush. Be honest, and then give your partner time to digest it. This shouldn’t sound like an ultimatum. Once you have had a good conversation, you can start working on the logistics. 


See an expert. Find a lawyer who specializes in marital affairs. You will find that they have dealt with many divorces, but that can be a positive. They will have the best advice based on the mistakes they have seen others make.  


I’m already married

If you have read this and realized you bought into the all-damning idea of Hollywood prenuptials, do not worry. It is never too late. If you draw up a contract after getting married, it is called a postnuptial agreement. There is not much difference other than the name. You can still sit down and have a fruitful conversation. And then you can still get that mutually beneficial contract as a couple.


Conclusion

Speak to your partner. Be honest. If you need financial protection, get a lawyer to draw up a contract. It will benefit all parties involved and bring you some peace of mind.

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